solo

5 more days to my 1st cry...!!

ahhaha...today acturally kp ask me go art wit her de..in the end she cannot..then i go solo lor..ha..completed my wire..then help kp done her drum...next must draw my mecanic bird le..scared will destory ha...now dunno wat to do or where to go..raining very big...lol

yesterday acturally wan go buy marker at plaza only de..then i say i wanted to see hat..so me n kp went lemon tee..in the end v lol lor..we saw plain shirt..then buy to do printing..then move in front abit saw skirt..but the pices show $30plus then we put back..then the shop keeper told us its priced 2for $10 onli..!!we both shock sia..then 1st time i so on stright away say ok on buyin it..!!ha..the buy alot of other stuff ar..witin half-an-hour we spend $20 plus..n its in PLAZA leh!!!lol rite...?but the scarf kp ask me to chose not i start to regret chosing tt..cause i wear like abit weird..should have taken the 1 be4..but its still nice...!ha..n hor kp ar...the blue shit i took like abit too small leh...how..die die le..ha..

hmm..read some blogs while i free...ha..yar wen i feel abit left out lar..ha but i not sad n i wont say those things..ha mayb is mornin blues..??ha wat happen to ur work piece..??need help..?? u know i will help de lar..n do jia you..!!i also need to do that lar..i left more then u..lol..
n about sheilding him..i will now say it clearly tt i would NOT sheild him cause his not worth..n he got wrongs..but try to understand tt hearin n knowing all this will affect me a little so i didnt really show whose side am i on...[but i still wanna know...at least i am not under the dark so must tell me k..?]
then also saw a few quite lovin in tagg box ar..[wha..da qing ma qiao ar...]ha then also add NP dere cause of u know who rite..?ha [no offence...i guess de..might not be true] hmm..n aiai u don stress lar..though watever i say may not be of any help n i don think i don hav the zi ge to say but like u always tell me is all in u..fate is in ur hands..ha but its how u see it that really make de difference..well i also don wanna say much cause as u should know i am also not entirely happy about all tts happening ..n after so much things tt i have been unhappy wit u i still try to trust u but at times i cant..so i am sorry if i don believe some things u say...oh anyway u still owe me my letter...remember..??ha...

lol..tis few days so fun..!ha n best of all

7MORE DAYS TO MY BIRTHDAY!!!...yeah!

yesterday went hospital whole day take 4 x-rays...dots expose to so many gama rays..hmm..mayb is alpha ray...??dunno lar..ha..quite fun leh...!then return school at about 12pn..every1 thought i was late...ha no lor..alot of ppl dunno i go hospital wat..y u say vanessa last 1 to know..??lol.. don anyhow say lor..then after sch say wan walk together de..make us so happie happie tt then in the end go grandma house...[act onli]ha..tt 1 today use alot lor...ha our class got a firece lol teacher tt come today...wanna take us for CME but our cher got come then give us attutide..scold john some more..tell him our cher here he don believe..then later paisae..ha only know how to act ar...?ha

then when ms sheila come it we tell her alot..she ask us to do graffit art sia..worte things about today..ha..yesterday also completed the book cai er lend me..its soOOoOo nice...!!very touching sia...n inspire-in too...!!
A POEM FROM THE BOOK i wanna share...

i love thee with breath,

smiles, tears of all my life___!

and if god chose,

i shall but love thee better after death.

die die

OMG...alot of work keep nv do...n everyday after CSP so tired how to do sia...pus i still got 6 items haven draw..8 items haven paint..die le...tis few days eQ very low ar...n very depressed de..ha..but smile smile wait 4 time pass lor...lol..ha..u say he looks at me in a different way..but i don think so lar..i juz think tt he dosent dare to face me...ha

dear lao gong..don so aggitated wit ur that friend..in life u will always meet different ppl..some worsten ur life some help brighten it...the decision still lies wit u..its a choice...n do make a choice u wont regret..watever u do,make the best out of it...! me will be dere wit u...n remember to smile...!!muckz

listening

muhaha...now writing 4 the sake of letting tt tow woman read..ha..tis week changed my 'xing xiang'ha quite funny lar they all say...but kai xing ju hao...can let me 4get things..ha by being not myself..!!muhaha...ok let vote...which style of me better..??ok..now must be doing art....today plan to draw finish everything..then can paint others..still got alot unfinished...die die..ha..later got listening must jia you oh everyone..!!

juz now juz watch finish NKF replay..hai..then something shoot me...hai things change super fast..to think last days still smsin u from u...now...nothing..my phone used to be soOo super busy..now whole day not even one sound...then i clearing my inbox n outbox..read all the things i used to recieved..why..?why..?why..??i want answers..!!reasons...!! something so tt i can reason wit myself...!!when i read all my outbox..those things i used to sent....from acturally doubt u..then trust u..then really fall..arrrgh..!!!!how i wish to really scream everything out...!!!!!is it worth giving so much i kept asking myself??

how i wish can brain wash sia...lol..i tot i can but i cant..hai..here to physco myself...

a poem goes...
"if u love some1 let them go..if they return ur love...it is meant to be..if they don..their love was nv urs to begine wit..."so it really shows tt its not meant to..so juz forgive urself lar girl,,forgive urself 4 being so niave....
n its true....a poem that i made when i am sec2..??litreture class..??ha

"wat is love..?is it a wind that blow pass..or is it a thorn that stays n hurt..."
yes...its a wind...it passes very quickly...n when its gone..they always leave a thorn which hurts..

ur back..

ur back..the back tt i got so used to...
the back which i would always see..

i wander..had u ever look back..?
whenever we go our own ways i always turned n face u...
counted to 10 in hope tt u will turn back n smile..
its a fantsy..a fantsy which is untrue..

the things u had said be4 were all lies..
lies which i trusted n believed so much on..

does things have to happen tis way...?
its bad enough to lose some1..n now i lose2..
is it worth to give in so much..n get nothing back..?

haiz

yoz! hows life..??mine..??disater sia..now at scholl using com while doing art..paint till v sian liao..plus cant really concentrate on everything i do...hai hai...ppl c i happie happie but i think only lao gong n raf they all know my type lar..[well maybe others know but they nv told me...]i always cover myself up wit an act..ha..can go become actress le...ha..juz few days only n everything in my world is upside down le...hai hate myself AGAIN..hai alot of times i do feel quite better under my act..but its different now...still v weird..numb ba..but luckly me i found a place which is so peaceful n nice..its like i can 4get everything bad tts happening to me....n the sky...its always there..always by my side..ha sometimes when i am down it will cry 4 me(ha rain lar)how i wish i can be dere 4 ever........

.....?

tis few days another 180 degree change...back into his old self..??like nothing hav happened weird...n confuse..but somethings is surely different...hope it wont affect us..hee..!!read to him the things le..made him v gulity like tt only...nothing le...hai he hor..dunno how to pamer ppl one..v dot dot..but really happie that its ok now...!yeah...! but i dunno wat he thinking now...

yesterday went queensway wit raf they all.ha..1st meet rx..then see her dress till so nice i v dot dot...then lol we go change..then i wear till super de lady sia but don act till v lady lar...they say overall still ok but better dont wear till like tt 1st..ha..walk around abit be4 we go settle the banner thing..ha do till v long sia..saw a cap tt looks abit like kp de..nice sia..wanna buy it but 30bucks leh...!!also saw the nike ORANGE band..ha but nv buy...ha..acturally wanna go buy something for monday de..but in the end didnt..cause don really know if i should buy 4him..is it worth doing so much..???ha..after finish doing the banner we go walk around again i trying to c got any sunglasses i like de..but not alot..then me raf n rx brought the same ear rings...acturaly wan buy some other stuff also but in the end didnt..then around 4plus then go back..sorrie hor didnt know u are free only at those time...but kinda dissapointed tt u cant come down..ha..too bad lor..cause i know i may nv wear something like tt out le..ha..then me n rx go park...i feel v relax there..its a nice place...n quite alot of memories..ha quite fun sia..!!sit on the swing...swing up n down..then got two mei mei come join us...they say next week meet same time same place..!ha got book the swing 1st..ha...there is also a boi boi v young de but his balancing skills v gd sia...shake here n dere wont fall de...future good sufer sia...!!ha...go market spec shop c some glasses..among them only like 1..but don really like the colour..ha..

LoSt soulD

yesterday nite quite happie leh..!!ha n even found my phone...guess where is it..??in a basket of cloths...dots..no wander cant hear the ringtone lor...ha n my oral v lol...going to finish le leh..!!then i say a english word...wah....!!!n i dunno y yesterday go do stupid stupid stuff...ha..after oral went up stairs..then went to class n went back again..total went pass 4 times like tt..but don think * knows..ha then pity rx..listen to me sing n sing..ha..at nite called n said to meet at 6:50...n i waited n waited n waited....4 around 20+mins...7:14 on my watch le...i gave up waiting...ran after a bus n got sch in only 5mins..!![ha..fast rite??]but i am super numb now...alot of things ar happening n all of it makes no sense to me..make me so confuse n bulr..dunno wats happnig now n * didnt say anything...cant really concentrate on my stuff..my 6sense was kinda rite...n i really dunno how to react now..hai...got alot of things wanna know..wanna ask..but dunno how to..hey..u stress ar..i haven even stress u stress me..v funny rite..??aiya dunno wat i doing..thinking..typing now...lost....so lost